Letter 12/8/2013

(We lost this email but we found it! So this one goes back in time).

I saw some missionaries from my MTC district this week. One elder asked me how it was being with a native (companion) and said that he's been worried about me. His concern was very thoughtful but I thought it was really weird. I love having a Korean companion. I can't imagine not having one. What will I do without one? I love her for who she is but I also like being able to ask her questions about language and culture, and having someone to back me up and tell me what's going on if I don't understand. And I just like Asians. I am Asian. 

I've noticed that the American missionaries complain a lot of and I feel bad for the native companions (the parable of the fat sheep) (this is a parable that Brock wrote when we lived in Japan - with this reference she is saying that the native missionaries seem like "fat sheep" that don't need as much "food" and support, But in Brock's parable, the fat sheep just ended up being sheep that had extra fluffy wool, so they looked fat, but underneath they were thin and they needed as much, or more, food and care as the other sheep). I think they have it harder. They can't play the foreigner card of they mess up, they have responsibilities and more is expected of them, they have to clean up after the foreign missionaries, important meetings and conferences are in English, no one cuts them slack, and people don't fawn over them like they do foreign missionaries. 

Letter 12/15/2013

I've been super scared for the cold weather but I don't think it's going to be that bad. It was -7  degrees celsius last night and I didn't think anything of it. I am concerned about my feet. They become numb and it's scary to walk on ice when you don't have control over your feet. The sidewalks are almost completely ice and it's okay for us - we link arms and save each other when we slip (we're pretty cute) - but we're scared for the poor grandmothers. I saw a grandmother today who was wearing bright pink socks (with a cute animal) over her shoes to prevent her from slipping. 

The bricks in the sidewalks aren't smooth so they create fun little hills of ice to slip on. The snow here is different than Utah or Illinois snow (or Virginia snow). The flakes are huge - huge, I tell you - and they're really icy. The snow is really pretty but it isn't super fun to play in. We tried to make a snowman in our church parking lot while we waiting for our students to show up for English class but the snow wouldn't stick and we were just sliding all over the parking lot. 

Korean rice is wonderful, truly wonderful. I could eat it for every meal. Korea has the super cute bakeries and French-style bread shops like Japan with the delicious milk bread. I don't understand why Americans eat so much bread but Americans haven't figured out how to make truly yummy bread.

I don't feel like I'm in a foreign country anymore. Everything seems perfectly normal and familiar.

I had a beautiful breakthrough this week with Korean. I just started understanding more of it. And I started speaking more. Words that I had had trouble remembering before now come quickly to my mind and I can say almost anything I want to say (I'm not fluent, however - I'm sure I sound like a three-year-old).

One of the missionaries in my ward says that I act super cute and I act like I'm Japanese. (He has AMAZING English and he can speak Japanese) I never realized how Japanese I was until I came here. I felt so different in Japan so I thought I was more American and I think I tried to be more American (wanting what you can't have mentality) so it's interesting to me to have other Asians tell me how Asian I am. I realized that I say "we" when referring to both Americans and Japanese.

I wrote "I can do hard things" on a paper and stuck it on a wall by my desk, thinking of Grandma. (this was a challenge from her Grandma Limburg, who is serving a mission in Fiji right now)

We weren't able to do a lot of street contacting this week. Because it's so cold hardly anyone is outside.

Students are finishing up their finals this week so people will stop ignoring us (hopefully!!). As you can imagine, they have super intense finals in all 13 subjects that make or break their hopes for college. School ends next week and doesn't start again until you guys come. Because everyone will be on break we're hoping to build good relationships with the Young Women, visit lots of Less Actives and teach lots of lessons to members and investigators. They probably have their long break in the winter because it's too cold to leave one's house.

We met with one of our investigators this week that we teach English and the gospel. She isn't interested in the gospel, nor does she have any Christian background so we asked her to read a pamphlet and come back with questions. The questions she came back with were crazy!!! The first one was; "Some people say God is an alien. What do you think about that? They say He is just an alien with special powers and intelligence and we are his/their (what's the word.... crop? experiment?). The pyramids were built by aliens and they possess special powers."

We watched the (Christmas Devotional) broadcast last night at our stake center. I couldn't understand much but I still had my notebook and pencil ready and I did have some good inspirations to write down that didn't come from spoken words.

Letter 12/1/2013

A lot of people have been super nice and they give us/feed us American food because they think it will make me happy. Their niceness makes me happy but it makes me sick. My stomach is pretty happy with the food here but I feel terrible when I eat American food. A couple gave us fried chicken and root beer (pretty expensive) and a lady took us to TGI fridays (so expensive). It reminds me how nasty American food really is. How do we all live like that? Golly. (She has been having a lot of digestive and food sensitivity problems that got REALLY bad in the MTC. Gluten is a big problem for her) That Gluten Digest stuff you gave me is actually the best. I took some during the Thanksiving dinner and I felt great. And that makes the difference of being able to work harder or not. If I feel terrible, I don't want to talk to anyone, all I can think about is my stomach, everything seems worse than it is, and all I want to do is go home. 

 

We have a decent number of appointments on a daily/weekly basis but the majority of them fall through. Koreans are super-duper busy and they're also afraid of hurting or feelings so they make plans that they don't intend to keep. One of our investigators is very impressionable and she always feels good about the gospel when we come to visit but when we're not there she gives into temptation and laziness. But she surprised us by soming to church yesterday!

 

We're thinking about teaching a Japanese class in addition to our English classes but I don't know if we'll really do it. I don't know if my Japanese is at a level where I can teach other people, especially if we don't have any materials.

 

We heart-attacked someone's door this week but we had the wrong address (the person must have moved) and we received a very angry phone call demanding that we return and take the hearts down ourselves. I don't understand why she didn't just take them down herself and why it made her so upset.

 

We went to visit a recent convert who has fallen inactive. Her apartment has the call-system at the front door and we couldn't remember her apartment number so we couldn't get in. I thought about praying for someone to go in or out of the building so that the door would open but then I thought that it was a stupid request because God can't control people like that. I focused a lot of my study this week on faith and after reflecting back on my learnings I gave a little prayer. Not two minutes later a woman walked into the building and we were able to slide in after her. It was perfect and miraculous. Nothing is impossible to God.

 

On our way to the Boggs' for Thanksgiving I talked to a woman from Canada who is teaching English at a university in Seoul. We had an interesting discussion about religion. She is very closed to religion and only believes is happiness and 'good feelings'. She seems pretty happy with her life but there was something wrong and I couldn't figure it out. Later I decided that it literally felt like something was missing from her life.

 

The Boggs were super nice. He's teaching Spanish on an American base here through DODDS and they're empty-nesters. They fed 16 misssionaries plus another little family!

 

My companion is the Sister Training Leader so we did splits this week so that she can train the other (non-Korean) sister in our zone. I went to Sanbon with Sister Lee Yoon-Ji who I love.

So we have a big problem with the YW not coming to church. (She and her companion are in the Young Womens Presidency) They don't want to come to church because they spend all day at school and they don't need more studying. They'd rather sleep. They're in school from 8am to 11pm. Any ideas? From anyone? We don't know what to do but bribe. They just don't understand the importance because they've never experienced the blessings and it's not part of their culture. (We had the same problem with the youth in our Japanese Branch)

Because I never hought of myself as a missionary sometimes I forget I am (that sounds silly, I know). I'll catch the reflection of my name tag in a mirror and think, "Oh look! A missionary. Oh. That's me. I'm a missionary. I'm wearing a name tag. That's me." And then I feel even more excited about missionary work!

Letter 11/24/2013

(This is a response  to my question asking what her apartment is like) It's called a villa, which is smaller than an apartment. We have a genkan (Japanese word for entryway where you take off your shoes), a baby kitchen, a bedroom, a study room, and a bathroom. I keep forgetting to take pictures. Our bathroom has a sink, toilet, and showerhead on a hose like those in Japan, with a hook on the wall between the sink and the toilet. I shower with my toilet. When we want to turn on the shower we twist a knob on the sink's faucet. 

A sister in our ward offered to feed us and she took us out to a restaurant instead of feeding us in her home. I hear that that's pretty common in Korea. But restaurants are pretty cheap. Food in general is pretty cheap.

We taugh the lesson on YW yesterday. It was fun. 

We're not allowed to knock on doors because this area is too sketchy but we sometimes visit the less-actives/inactives. Most of the time no one answers the door so we prepare message cards to stick on their doors/mailboxes.

I naturally want to look at TVs and listen to music that I hear but I have to tell myself to stop. It's surprisingly relieving. It doesn't make sense but it makes me feel relieved that I don't have to pay attention to those. Maybe the reason for the liberating feeling is because it gives me more space for the Lord (2 Ne4:27). Like trials, I think it's a blessing in disguise. It's a way for me to show God that I love Him more and I care about Him enough to put away everything that I want. And maybe that's how following commandments gives us more freedom.

The RS sisters feed the ward lunch every week. They come to prepare it on Saturday and leave Sacrament meeting early to get it ready. Food is a big deal.

I told dad already but we have a new investigator who isnt' really interested in the gospel right now but she will be! We also got a referral last night!! Woohoo! We've been working and not seeing the fruits of our labors but we now have people to teach!!!! Hooray! People have been blowing us off for kimjang (the preparation of kimchi - it's the season for that right now - and it's a big deal!) and dropping their appointments.

I was feeling bad this week because I make my companion have to work harder to compensate for my lack of Korean. The sisters in my zone (Of 8, 6 of them are Korean!) are all very nice to me and try very hard to include me and teach me about Korean culture. We had zone conference this week and I got to talk to President Morrise (her mission president) for a long time. I felt better after talking to him.

I'm getting more courageous and talking to people even though I can't say much and I can't really understand what they're saying.

Letter 11/18/2013

We had dinner at the mission leader's house last night. It was the first meal away from home where kimchi wasn't provided. The gave us each a scoop of vanilla ice cream and offered us DoTerra oils to drop on top so that we could make the flavor that we want. Such a good idea! 

We spend most of our time looking for people. We talk to people on the public transportation but we mostly just walk around and talk to people. We talk to people stopped at crosswalks and bus stops, or people who look distressed. We helped some old ladies who had been waiting for a half an hour for an elevator to work again. They were scared to cross the main road so they usually took the elevator down to the station, walked underground, and then took the elevator back up. But the elevator was broken and they couldn't take their stuff down the stairs. So we called a maintenance man for them and helped them carry their stuff down into the train station. One lady gave us each a piece of gum in return. It was pretty cute.

On Thursday we went to our usual service project at an old-folks home. We helped them with their art projects and talked to them. They're adorable. We had an extra service project on Friday to help some people (I have no idea who they were) make kimchi (it's called kimjang). It was so fun. We were up on the roof of an apartment building. They had the hot seasonings (I don't know what they're called - the gochugaru stuff) (hot pepper paste) and the salted cabbage prepared. They dumped the gochugaru onto big tables covered in plastic and we rubbed it into the cabbage. We rubbed each leaf, front and back and stuffed a little extra in between the leaves. Then we wrapped the heads up into their own leaves and stacked them in tubs.

 And we got to eat some!! And they gave us a head to take home! One of the beauties of kimchi is that if I eat something that has a less than desirable taste or texture I can stuff kimchi into my mouth and the kimchi will overpower everything else. It's wonderful. 

We had a joint mission conference on Saturday with the Seoul Mission. Elder David F. Evans (who we know from Japan) spoke to us. It was very good. He told us some exciting things about missionary work, some of which we're not supposed to share.  There are now over 83,000 missionaries. 

We had stake conference this weekend. I tried really hard to understand but it's mentally exhausting. When we met with our mission leader last night I could understand about 80% of what he was saying if I focused really hard but then I was focusing so much on each word that I wasn't getting the whole picture.

My companion tells me that sometimes she forgets I'm American, let alone a greenie because I act so Asian. She says, "are you American? Are you Japanese? I don't know." I don't know either. But now that I'm back in Asia, I don't know if I can ever leave. She tells me that my pronunciation is good and I have a more extensive vocabulary than the average greenie, both due to Japan. I'm teaching her Japanese (she already knows a little bit) and English in return for her teaching my Korean. I use Japanese to help my study Korean. I have pieces of paper stuck up on the wall in front of my desk with important vocab terms and I have the translations in Japanese to help me remember better, retain Japanese, and teach my comp Japanese. Japanese has helped a lot. If something confuses me I learn what it is in Japanese and then it makes sense. And I also learn more about Japanese. I had no idea what I was saying. (in Japanese) I just knew when it was appropriate to say it. I can't believe I was so ignorant. (she learned Japanese as a small child, the way a first language is learned, and is having many revelations about the language now) I use Japanese everyday. A lot of Koreans know Japanese and there's a man in my ward who can only speak Japanese. I must hurry and learn Korean so that I can translate for him. My life makes so much more sense now. (now that she understands more about Japanese from learning Korean) I love languages.

More people asked me if I'm Russian. Why?

There are a lot of mountainns in my area. Most of the cities and towns have 'san' in them (Ansan, Sanbon). (San is the a word for mountain that both Japan and Korea took from the Chinese in Japanese, Mt Fuji is Fuji-San) They're pretty mountains like the Virginian mountains.

One of the elders looks like Noah and reminds me of him. He's a sweetie too.

Natasha's first email from Korea! 11/11/2013

(Tashi the mission home with President and Sister Morrise, and her new native Korean companion!)

We flew into Incheon at 7:30 PM, met our mission president, put our luggage into cars, grabbed a Book of Mormon, and got on the subway to go to the mission home. It was hard to talk to people because there were 40 missionaries on one subway. I talked to a couple that only spoke Japanese. We got to the mission home at 11:30.

In the morning we studied, had interviews with President Morrise, attended some orientations and ate lunch. President Morrise said he thought my Korean was good enough to put me with a native companion. I don't know what he was thinking. My companion does speak English. She studies English during my language study time. I'm glad to be put with a native companion. I hope I can learn Korean faster. And she won't teach me incorrect things. My companion is Jeong He-Ri. We are in the Ahnsang ward. We have four elders with us, One of them came in from the MTC with me.

Hauling my luggage across Seoul (2 hours with multiple transfers) wasn't the funnest thing I've ever done. My shoulders are covered in nasty broken blood vessels. We went straight to the church because there was a YSA activity. I wasn't sure what was going on, but we were practicing Christmas songs for a performance or something. I'm pretty sure my face looked like death.

It was really hard to say goodbye to everyone at the MTC. The tears were flowing after our evening class. We had to say good bye to three of our teachers plus all of the missionaries. Sisters Jeong and Kil both thanked me for teaching the gospel to their people and it made me cry so hard. My face was so red and blotchy it wasn't even funny.

We met with the ward mission leader before church. There are only nine men in our ward. All of the missionaries met with the branch presidency and they called my companion and I to be the 1st and 2nd counselors in Young Women's.

While I was in the MTC I could understand better than I could speak (I think that's normal - guessing is easier than using your brain) but that is no longer the case. I have absolutely no idea what anyone is saying. It's pretty bad. I felt like I was in a daze all day. I would just look at the speakers and teachers, feeling like I should know what they were saying but not being able to. I trusted my companion to tell me if I needed to know anything important. I would have moments where I would think, "Oh! They're talking about repentance.... but I don't know any other word." or "Ooh. They used the 'must-form' but I don't know what we need to do." I'm pretty sure people could have paid money to watch my face. It didn't help that I was exhausted. The night before we left, I only slept for about 4 hours and I only slept for a couple of hours on the plane. Then I only slept for a few hours the night we flew in. I fell asleep during journal last night and my companion woke me up at 10:30. I had been looking forward to catching up on sleep on that plane ride for two months. I did help Sister Rose give out a Book of Mormon on the plane and we got his number.

After church we went to the Sanbon ward building  for a Young Women's activity. We went straight form there to an inactive member's house. She and her husband both used to be active but they stopped attending church because of work and now they're admittedly lazy. She fed us rice, kimchi, kimchi soup, beans, mandarin oranges, persimmons, sweet potatoes, and blanched greens. It was delicious. Oh my heaven the food is so good. Where has it been all of my life? For lunch today we went to a restaurant called kimbap nara (kimbap land) (kimbap is like sushi). A couple of different people thought I looked Russian. One guy said he thought I was Russian because I was too pretty to be an American. What do I say to that. I think I hear the word 'pretty' more often than any other word. It's the ultimate compliment. A lot of girls have self-esteem issues. Plastic surgery is unbelievably common.

We went to workout in a little exercise park this morning. They have these little machines that are incredibly useless. I can't even explain them. They don't do anything. I gave up and jogged.

I've seen lots of men taking pictures of me. Some try to hide it and some have no shame.

My area is kind of rural. It's like Chiba or Saitama.  (areas in Japan)I feel like I've been on a long trip and I've just come home. Everything is just perfect. I'm reliving all of the sounds, smells, tastes, feelings, and all of the senses from my childhood. It makes me so happy. I'm surrounded in it. Every minute I see something that makes me happy. I'm so happy. It's just perfect.

Seventh MTC Letter 11/1/2013

(Missionaries only get 1 hour a week to read and reply to email, so she may not be able to give a long reply through email, but she would be happy to hear from you)

This is her last week at the MTC, she leaves for Seoul at 3:30 am (!!!) on Thursday the 7th of November

Her new address will be:

Song Pa Ku O-Gum Dong 24-1

Seoul, Seoul 138-855

South Korea

*****************************************
One of the counselors in my branch presidency told me that he really likes the mission president in Daejeon.

I was thinking recently about 1 Nephi 3:7 and I was looking at everything the Lord has done to make it possible for me to serve a mission. And even now, after I've already left, I can see that the Lord won't give me a commandment without helping me to accomplish it.

I've changed a lot. People tell me what they think of me or what they think I'm like and I think "What? That's nothing like me. Do they not know me at all? How would they get that view of me?" and I realized that that is how I am now. It isn't how I used to be. I expect people to see me as the sweet, quiet one but that's not me anymore. I let my emotions show, I talk more, I voice my opinion, I let people know if they're being annoying, I'm happier, and I'm just not little Tashi anymore. There's no way I could have been the missionary that I needed to be while staying my old self. And so the Lord has changed me to be who I need ot be. Because I was obedient, despite my fear, the Lord prepared a way for me to accomplish his call.